Too tired to sleep

I am SO VERY MUCH ENTIRELY TOO OLD for this late night crap.  We didn’t stay for the whole show (we caught a few songs from the headlining band, but then we left), so we got home around 1am and still got up at 6.  I don’t regret it – the Arkells were freakin’ amazing and we were right up against the stage and no, they didn’t pull John up on stage this time, but they didn’t do that bit at all, so it’s okay, and we got to have a nice conversation with the singer after the show, and MAN I love them.  So I don’t regret it, but it’s 8pm on the day after, and my eyes are so tired they hurt.  Hurts to close them, hurts to leave them open.

We met this trio of college girls, friends from high school, who have taken the week off to get together (they don’t go to the same schools) and follow the Arkells and Blossoms (the other band who played last night) from Portland to San Francisco to Coachella.  They were hilariously excited.

Gotta go to bed.  I think tomorrow might be harder than today was.  Because I’m old.

Early bedtimes are a must this week

I am sore and tired and sore and tired and sore and tired and can I have another day off please?  Yesterday’s workout caught up to me this morning.  I was going to go to a 9:15 yoga class this morning, but I could barely lift my arms over my head and that would have made yoga difficult.  Also, any balancing would have been just impossible because I’m SO TIRED I can’t see straight.  John had a gig last night, and it went late, and then it went later, and then they finally took the stage, and then it was even later because Daylight Saving Time started last night, so it was 3:30 in the morning before I crawled into bed.  Stupid spring forward.  Yoga at 9:15 didn’t have a chance.

So it’s 8:15 on a Sunday night, which technically should feel like 7:15 on a Sunday night, but as far as I’m concerned it feels like midnight on a Sunday night and I really need to be sleeping.


I get up early every day, and I’m tired first thing in the morning, but I usually get over it pretty quickly.  Today was not like that.  John drove Molly back to Portland last night, spent the night there, and drove back this morning after dropping her off at the airport.  I didn’t go because I had stupidly scheduled a ton of meetings (two with customers) for this morning, and I couldn’t reschedule them at the last minute (and one was at 5:30am).  Instead, I stayed home, stayed up later than I should have, woke up at 2am, woke up at 4am, woke up at 4:36am, and then stayed awake until my alarm went off at 5.  Then I snoozed for 10 minutes because of course I did.  I have been fighting yawns and heavy eyelids all day.  I rescheduled my riding lesson because I don’t think I could stay on in this condition, and I think I’m going to skip yoga because no one wants to hear me snore when they’re supposed to be finding their breath in the first five minutes of class.

The only thing that’s keeping me going right now is that it’s nice out for the first time in days and I want to run.  It might be more like crawling, but at least I’ll get some sunshine.  Then I can go to bed.

Can’t brain today

Staring blankly at the screen is not going to make an idea appear.  It’s like watching a pot, and MAN that was a hard one for me to think up.  First sentence written, second sentence totally blocked.  I got stuck on the pot adjective.  It’s like watching what KIND of pot?  What describes the pot?  This is a saying – “like watching a _____ pot” – what’s the missing word?

Oh, right.

A watched pot.  Totally screwed up that idiom.  (You’re an idiom.  Your MOM’S an idiom.)  I think maybe I need some sleep.  6am felt earlier today than usual, and work felt more overwhelming, and I went to yoga for the first time in a week, and I could feel it, and 6am is going to come even earlier tomorrow, so I’m out.  Me and my watched pot are going to bed.

How is this STILL a problem for me?!?

I just don’t get it.  We have lived in Oregon, on the west coast, in the Pacific time zone, for ten months now, and I STILL get thrown by the time zone difference with the east coast.  STILL.  Like, it just happened, just now, not 30 seconds ago.

I’m sitting at my work laptop, which I deliberately keep on eastern time because it’s helpful during the work day.  I don’t usually write from here, but it was on, and I’m lazy.  I’m also TIRED, which is why, when I glanced at the clock on the corner and it said 11:55pm, I thought to myself, No wonder I’m tired.  It’s MIDNIGHT.  What am I still doing up?  Yeah, NO.  It’s 9pm.  It’s not that late.  I have plenty of reasons to be tired – I’ve been up since 5:45, I haven’t been getting enough sleep lately, and I think I’m getting sick again – but it being midnight is not one of them.  BECAUSE IT’S NOT MIDNIGHT.

More rescheduling is needed

Today is our anniversary (16 years), but we’re going to postpone it for at least day.  Or maybe just extend it?  Whatever works.  We got up at 4am this morning, drove to the airport, got on flight 1 of 2 (which I slept through – yay exhaustion), had a quick layover in Minneapolis, and then got on flight 2 of 2 to Portland.  We got home around 4:30 (which felt like 7:30), then had to run back out to the store for milk so we can have tea tomorrow because neither of us is 100% yet.  Actually, I’m a total mess (although I think I feel better overall).  I look like I’m about to turn zombie.  I went to Urgent Care Tuesday afternoon because the bottom half of my left eye is solid red, and after about 30 seconds (if that), the doctor I saw announced I have pinkeye and prescribed antibiotic drops.  I’m taking them even though I’m not convinced I have pinkeye or that it’s not the viral kind, but they’re making the skin under my eye yellow like a fading bruise, so actually, I look like a zombie who’s being abused by her spouse.  This is how I traveled today.  With my glasses on, of course.  No contacts allowed right now.  I might be going back to my own doctor tomorrow.

Anyway, today isn’t a good day to celebrate our anniversary because of the zombie problem and the travel exhaustion, so we’ll try again tomorrow.  Tonight we’re having pie for dinner and watching A Royal Night Out and then sleeping until a train wakes us up.

Crossing time zones is exhausting

We’re back home from a trip to PA and MD that included a very cool anniversary dinner and quality time with our new nephew, and I will tell you all about those things, but not tonight.

Goal: get back to regular posting

Deadline: ….soon

Right now: sleep

We got up at 4am this morning so we could leave the house at 4:45am so we could be at the Philadelphia airport by 6am so we could get on a plane at 7am.  We landed in Portland (after a stop in Denver) at 1pm, which felt like 4pm, and then we had to drive back to Eugene, where we stopped at the grocery store before finally getting home about 4:30pm, which felt like 7:30pm.  Now it’s 7pm but it feels like 10pm, and I’ve been awake for 18 hours and traveling for 14 of them, and I’m going to stop typing now and go to sleep.

I am VERY happy to be home.  I love our bed.  It’s better than every other bed.  All of them.

Next time won’t you sing with me

In the airport again (LaGuardia this time), same deal with only 30 minutes of free WiFi.  Whatever, airports.

In the same vein, we got here, following the signs to Terminal C to check in for American Airlines.  Got our boarding passes for gate D-something.  The guy who took our bags said we had to go to Terminal B for the D-gates.  Don’t terminals usually have the same letter as the gates?  So we checked in at C and got a shuttle to go to B to get on a plane at D.  I am now reciting my ABCs.

It’s not THAT confusing (we made it to the gate, after all), but I’m cruising on very little sleep over the last few days.  Saturday started early, with a long day of travel and a late night when we arrived.  We didn’t have to get up especially early Sunday, Monday, or today, but I slept pretty badly.  The hotel walls were thin, there was constant activity in the hallways, and the pillows SUCKED.  They looked all fluffy and nice, but they flattened into nothing as soon as you put your head down and the air squeezed out.  My neck hurts.  Plus all the emotions and the public face on the whole time and I’m. So. Tired.

We land in Portland at 7:30pm local, but then we have to get our car and drive home, so it’ll be 10pm at the earliest before we get home.  Probably closer to 11.  And tomorrow morning has to start on time, so there will be no sleeping in until Saturday.  On the plus side, there’s no one to tell me I can’t go to bed at 6pm tomorrow night or every night the rest of this week, and Saturday isn’t that far away.

I don’t really feel like it

I don’t have much to say, but I feel like I’ve been MIA a lot this past week, and I don’t like that feeling.  We’re on Long Island for the funeral of John’s cousin Kerri’s husband, and we spent the entire day yesterday at a funeral home for a very emotional wake.  Lots of people, lots of tears.  The burial is this morning (Monday), followed by lunch with the family (I think), and then John and I will spend the evening with his parents, hopefully discussing happier things.

Then back home to Oregon.

We met Emily and Sean’s new baby boy yesterday (SO cute at nearly 6 weeks old), who fell asleep in my arms during breakfast.  That was maybe the best part of the day.  They went home last night, though, so I don’t have that to look forward to today.

Bleary-eyed and expected to make sense

Some days, the whole getting up really early and immediately working thing is hard.  It’s dark, it’s chilly, and I want to go back to bed.  It’s going to get darker and chillier (not today – that would be apocalyptic).  I need to start searching for a really good incentive.  Right now, I’ve been awake for 40 minutes, contacts in for 20 of those minutes, and I’m about to start a 90-minute conference call.  Maybe they won’t notice that I’m barely following along.

I don’t have to

I should work out, but I’m not going to.

I should do some laundry, but I’m not going to.

I should write about seeing Weird Al two Fridays ago, but I’m not going to.

I should write about meeting new people in Portland two Sundays ago, but I’m not going to.

I should plan something healthy for dinner tonight, but I’m not going to.

I’ll do all those things soon.

Instead, I’m going to read my book.

I’m going to fold the clothes I’ve already washed and do the rest tomorrow.

I’m going to think about what I’ll write about Weird Al and Portland peeps and be better prepared for it when I get there.

I’m going eat pasta and garlic bread and not feel guilty about it, even though I had Indian food last night and should never eat again.

I’m going to be still and quiet and go to bed early and get a normal night’s sleep that will end with my alarm at 5am tomorrow.

If I do it right, 5am won’t hurt that much, and when I get to the end of the workday, I’ll have the energy to work out and do laundry and make dinner and write bloggy things with pictures.

Why am I not already asleep?

I can feel my brain leaking out through my ears.  I am SO TIRED.  Yesterday, I worked 9 hours.  Then, because we were doing a software upgrade on a production environment, I got back online in the evening to test the upgrade.  It didn’t go well.  Five hours later (nearly 1am my time, nearly 4am eastern), we gave up for the night and went to bed.  I got up five hours after that and got back to work, and I got at least two more hours of sleep than the two guys who were working late with me.  I don’t know how they made it through the work day.  To make matters worse, we still haven’t fixed the issue.

Today was not fun.  Tomorrow is not likely to be, either.  This week is not a great work week.

I’m going to bed.

Wake me up when…no. Don’t.

So….I started to write a post, and judging by the number of misspelled and outright missing words I found, what I really need is to go to bed.  We got our bed back last night, and I slept well for the first time in two weeks, but one night isn’t enough.

Tonight, we will do a little unpacking, eat dinner, and crash.  EARLY.  Our mornings are early, since we’re attempting to work east coast hours.  The early mornings and an air mattress for nine days – not a good combination.  I do not recommend it.

I do recommend sleep.  Which I am going to have.  Soon.

I should know better

Tip for Future Me: Don’t go out carousing the night Daylight Saving Time starts.  You lose an hour of sleep and it hurts WAY more than it would any other weekend.

Jess and I went out last night.  The plan was to have dinner out, call it an earlyish night, and get up early this morning to meet at her favorite bakery for a light breakfast.  Some of that happened.

We were walking back from dinner (at Level, which was SO good) and it was only 10 something, so we decided to see if anyone was playing the piano at the upstairs piano bar at Middleton’s Tavern.  We didn’t make it upstairs right away, though, because there was a band playing downstairs, and they were really good.  People were dancing, and that’s all the invitation I need, so we joined the crowd and sang and danced.  When the band took a break, the party moved upstairs.  There was a guy on the piano, sort of half-pianist/singer, half-DJ (it was kind of strange), and he was really good and everyone was really happy, so the singing and dancing continued upstairs until he played two songs in a row we didn’t know/didn’t like.  Back downstairs we went, back to the band (who played REALLY good stuff), with more dancing and singing (with the strangers who were following the same upstairs/downstairs patterns as us) right up until the band’s last set ended.  I don’t know if the bar was closing, but it was certainly time for us to close, so we left then and headed home.  It was maybe 1:45 when I walked in the door, and just a few minutes later, it was after 3am because I FORGOT ABOUT THE TIME CHANGE.  Damn it.

Morning came early, but not as early as we’d planned.  I still woke up just before 8am (EDT), feeling better than I had any right to feel, and I decided to suck it up and run over to meet Jess.  She’s right about this bakery – I had a latte (forgot to order decaf) and a sugary delicious bun of some kind.  Yummy.  And then we took a 4-mile walk.

I may not have made great decisions last night, but this morning’s decisions have been okay (and I feel better for them).  And to reward myself (and also get in one last visit before we move), we’re going to Ray’s for dinner.  I am going to have the best steak in the world.  And all the mashed potatoes.  I could demolish some mashed potatoes right now.

I’m home!!!

My time in Virginia this week did not go like I thought it would.  The work days were crazy, but I probably should have assumed they would be.  It’s the evenings, the hotel stay, that were so different from my expectations.  My vision of those evenings included lots of quiet time to myself, time to read, go to bed early, sleep well – miss John, certainly, but enjoy my alone time anyway.  That is decidedly NOT how those two nights went.  I did it to myself, of course.

Tuesday night, I went straight from work to happy hour with some coworkers (as I mentioned the other day, in a post fueled by wine and cookies), and I stayed out much later than I had planned.  It’s fine – I was having a good time – but it was 9:30 when I got in, after 10:30 before I got out of the bathtub, and around 11 when I went to bed, with an alarm set for 5:30 so I could get up and exercise.  I read a little (tub time!), but not much, and I slept terribly.  Not a relaxing night.

Wednesday, I worked late and went directly to a restaurant to have dinner with Susan (from boxing) and Molly.  Back in the hotel by 9:30 again, but this time with Molly, who was staying with me so she could avoid the commute from DC the next morning (and, presumably, to hang out with me).  We stayed up until midnight (slumber party!) and woke up at 6am.  She got up to exercise.  I had another terrible night’s sleep (nightmares about packing suitcases in a hotel room with a wasp, a puppy, and about a dozen people hanging around), so I stayed in bed until about 6:45.

So now I’m home, and we have a weekend without plans.  I think.  I hope.  I would like to read.

I miss my bed

Of the last 14 days, I have spent only 4 of them sleeping in my own bed.  It would be cool if we could take it with us on short trips.  We were in OR for a few days (2 hotel nights, 3 nights at Will and Christina’s, 1 night on a plane), then home for 3 nights, then up to CT for the weekend (2 nights in PA, 1 in CT), then home for 1 night, and then I came to VA for work, and tonight is my second (and last) night in a hotel.  Don’t get me wrong – none of those nights have been uncomfortable (except the night on the plane), and every single shower I’ve had in hotels and other people’s houses has been better than the shower at home, but – my bed.  My stuff.  Not living out of a bag.

Actually, I slept terribly last night.  Noises from the hallway, noises from the parking lot, noises from the room next door (sick and crying child, I think), went to bed late and got up early – I’m surprised I made it through the day.  I tried the hotel gym this morning.  Ran a mile and a half on the treadmill, did some weights.  They keep that room a bit too warm for me.  The thermostat was set to 70, and it was a muggy, sweaty 70.  I didn’t end up doing much, but I suppose it was better than nothing.  I’ll try again tomorrow.  Tonight, I read.


I would like a do-over of today.  Can anyone make that happen for me?  I’d really appreciate it.

No?  Fine.  Tomorrow will just have to be my Sunday, plus work.

That sounds awful – all the stress of knowing the work week is about to start, plus it’s actually Monday.  I changed my mind.  Let’s skip straight to Tuesday.

I thought she was only afraid of thunder

I got very little sleep Sunday night because of a certain scaredy-cat cocker spaniel who was spooked by the wind. It was certainly very windy all night, and the wind was howling past the open window and doing its best to knock things over, but it’s wind!  Not solid, not harmful.  Daisy spent the first half of the night half on my chest, panting in my direction (her breath is AWFUL), shivering uncontrollably, and making her piggy snort noises as a break from the panting once every couple of minutes.  I don’t know if you’ve ever tried, but I have found that it is hard to sleep with a noisy vibrating dog lying on your chest.  I moved her to my side at some point (she resisted being that far from my face, but I couldn’t breathe), but that didn’t help much because she was still shaking and snorting.  Then, around 3am, the scary wind monster rattled everything in the room.  She stood up, practically blurry with vibrations, jumped off the bed, hid herself between the dresser and the wall, and then crawled UNDER the dresser.  I pulled her out and put her back on the bed with me, but she jumped right back off and went back under.  I left her there the rest of the night.  When I woke up around 7, she was sleeping under there with her nose sticking out.

It’s still windy today, so she’s been glued to my side, hanging out in the basement with me while I worked all morning.  Ridiculous dog.  It’s a good thing she’s cute.


I think I left my brain at the food court

We braved the mall today.  It was…not terrible, but we’re both completely worn out.  What is it about shopping that takes so much out of people?  It wasn’t that much walking, and it wasn’t that crowded.  Maybe it’s about the decisions?  We spent entirely too long in one store, considering a couple of ideas, and then we spent even longer in Clarks, trying on too many shoes.  (They actually had some shoes in John’s size (almost – not wide enough).)  After that, there was one more particular thing I was looking for (an idea of a thing), and we got to the point where I’d see a likely store, cruise through it in 30 seconds or fewer, and walk right back out – not the right place, they don’t have the thing.  When I found that I wasn’t even looking around anymore, we knew we’d had enough.  But then we had to walk back through the entire mall to find where we parked the car.  There’s something weird about the layout of that place.  It makes zero sense to me.

This post is not making that much sense to me, either.  Better publish quick before I think about it too much!  (That is not how this is supposed to work…)

It was a long day

Last night after I finished working, I changed into soft pants and a long sleeve t-shirt.  Several hours later, John cocked his head to one side and said, “I’m fairly certain your shirt is on backwards.”  I looked down.  The logos of the companies who endorsed that particular turkey trot looked back up at me.  Yeah.  Backwards.

John: When did that happen?

Me: When I put it on….?  I don’t understand the question.