So….we’ve been a bit stressed lately. After the holiday stuff and the family stuff this weekend, we crashed on our couch and stayed there until Sunday night. Saturday afternoon and evening, we watched Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz. How have we never seen these movies? They’re so much fun! How can I wait until The World’s End is out on DVD? Brian (who is in town for his semi-annual Coast Guard rotation thing) came over Sunday, and we watched six Doctor Who episodes in a row. It was fantastic. For those keeping track, we started with the Christmas episode between seasons 6 and 7 (I cried), and then we watched the first five episodes of Season 7. Today, I came home sick from work (not feeling all that great this morning), and I’ve been watching Supernatural by myself (four episodes so far). Maybe not the best use of my time, but hey – don’t judge me.
Roxy died today. It’s blunt, but it’s true, and it sucks. It was this morning. It’s only been a few hours, but they’ve been the longest hours I can remember. How is it possible that it’s still today?
On my way out of the office, I sneezed as I stepped off the elevator. My eyes watered, and my nose tickled because I was suppressing a second sneeze, and I could swear people were looking at me like I was Patient Zero. Dudes, it’s allergy season! Besides, I didn’t sneeze ON you. I didn’t even sneeze AT you. Maybe I should have. Next time. Watch out, starers. I’m coming for you.
Slowly, with lots of wheezing and sniffling.
Like a zombie.
And just as terrifying.
I think I might be getting sick. I can’t tell yet if it’s just seasonal allergies, but since John just got over the flu, I’m a little nervous. My head is a little (not a lot) congested, my throat is sore enough to hurt when I swallow, the lymph nodes right under my jawline are swollen, and I think I had a fever for a little bit during the night – I woke up freezing and shivering and went scrambling for socks and warmer clothes and more blankets. Everything but the fever could mean allergies – that stuff happens to me every spring. And fall. And at random times throughout the rest of the year. I was planning on running today, but I think I’m not going to. We have a 5K with Jess in less than a week, but I gave up any hope of a good race a few weeks ago. Running today wouldn’t help that much, and a day of real rest might. So I’m going to do nothing. Almost nothing. I might go to the library with John. Maybe.
Going to bed early didn’t work. I had crazy dreams and I woke up too many times. So what’s different? I haven’t been overeating, I haven’t been drinking caffeine much (and what I’ve had was all gone no later than mid-morning), I haven’t been exercising at night… I haven’t done anything out of the ordinary the last couple of days. The only thing I can think is that sleeping sitting up (because I’ve been so congested) is just not working for me anymore.
Boring boring boring boring.
I’m putting off stuff I don’t want to do, but it’s not leading to interesting stuff here…
Hmph. I might be boring right now, but my book isn’t.
Hey, guys, I tried. I only have one thing on my mind today, and I will most likely write about it tomorrow. I stared and stared at this little blank window, but I came up empty. Also, I’m tired and also also, I’m getting up early tomorrow, so I officially give up. Good night!
Riley is going insane, I’m freezing to death, and I think I just heard “Gangnam Style” coming out of John’s office. The world is ending TONIGHT. Hug your loved ones and duck and cover. (Isn’t that what the Mayans said to do?)
Riley has been one uncontrollable bundle of annoying energy today. If he could focus that energy on keeping me warm, I could handle it, but instead he’s been bouncing off the walls while I sit at my computer and shiver. The thermostat says it’s 67 degrees in here. I don’t see how it could be. I’m so COLD.
[Pause while I wrap myself in a blanket. It's times like these when I wish I had a snuggie. Kind of.]
I think I’m getting old. My back hurts (lower back – it’s felt achy and a little twinge-y since my last Muscle Blast class two Mondays ago). My left arm was tingling off and on for almost a week (it’s stopped now) because I think I pinched a nerve doing a handstand in yoga class (a week ago Wednesday). I make grunting noises when I lunge to get over the dog gate at the bottom of the stairs, and worst of all, I was SO over Halloween after about the tenth group of kids. I lose patience for that quicker every year. All we were doing was handing out candy to the kids who came by. I can’t imagine how the parents of 8 or 9-year-olds must feel, trailing their kids down block after block. I mean, when they’re 3 or 4 or 5, they’re totally adorable, they need your help, and they get tired fast (very important, that). Beyond that age, can they even get tired out? It’s exhausting just thinking about it.
I missed the very beginning of the evening because I had to take Roxy to the vet. Once again, her paw was bothering her and she licked it so much she made it worse. Yay for obsessive dogs.
Here’s my sweetpea last night at the vet:
And here she is today, completely miserable in her Cone of Shame. The sock just wasn’t working this time.
Why do I always think this will work? When I don’t have any great (or middling or even bad) ideas for the blog, I think I’ll be inspired by something on the internet. An hour later, I’ve got nothing. But at least I lost that hour. A precious hour when I could have been reading.
Sorry, guys. This is pathetic.
Why are you so big? You make it very hard for me to keep up some weeks. Don’t misunderstand; I’m THRILLED you’re as big as you are because that means there’s always something new to find. Lately, though, I don’t have time during the day, and I don’t have the energy after work. I’m missing out on so much. I haven’t visited my bloggy buddies (I think I’m stealing that from Wombat – Wombat, can I steal this please?) in forever, and I certainly don’t mean to neglect them. Some evenings I open tabs for all of my favorite websites and I still don’t get to them all. Also, why does WordPress insist that I’m misspelling favorite? Also, why is “Moves Like Jagger” allowed to be used in commercials? I’ve managed to avoid hearing it for weeks and weeks, but now it’s back and stuck in my brain. Also also, if happy little bluebirds fly beyond the rainbow, why, oh why can’t I? That may help with my song-stuck-in-brain syndrome.
Oh, wait, this is a letter.
What? I love the internet.
Kind of? I mean, I’m definitely sorry, but not so much that I’m posting more than this tonight. Because I’m tired. And it’s late, or getting there.
Is it better to have a post that doesn’t say anything (and shouldn’t really count) or just to not update the blog until I have something to say? I have stuff, actually, but not the time to devote to it. Let’s try again tomorrow.
If you can’t say something interesting, you should just shut up. Too bad I can’t take my own advice.
I have nothing to say tonight. Is that okay? When this happens, I should probably stay off the blog, but I don’t have that kind of control.
Instead of babbling, I’ll leave you with a couple of videos. The first is about little green army men with British accents. I can’t embed it (well, I probably could but it would take too much effort right now), so you’ll just have to trust me and click on the link. It’s funny.
The second video is the first episode of Written By a Kid, a web series created by the Geek and Sundry people. These guys find a little kid and ask him/her to tell them a story. Then they animate it and show it over the voice of the kid telling the story. Super cute.
Now I can’t decide if I want to watch more Geek and Sundry videos or read my book. What is wrong with me?
No memory problems today. That I’m aware of. Just a growing sense of annoyance that I have to work. Don’t throw things – I know I’m whining. Today wasn’t even a bad day. My meetings went fine, I got some stuff done, and I did it all from the dining room table. I spent the first part of the morning in my workout clothes (with my post-workout sweaty smell), and then I showered and spent the rest of the day in my clean yoga clothes (because it’s Wednesday). Why bother putting regular clothes on when the next time I leave the house it’ll be to go to the gym for yoga?
Can I be a little bit annoyed at how dark it is at 8pm already? When did that happen? Now I need to get a headlight or something for my bike. I was invisible on my way home from yoga a few minutes ago. Heh. Yoga makes me invisible. Cool. Until I get hit by a car. Not cool.
This week has been horrible. I’m badly in need of peace and quiet and serenity, so my fingers are crossed that the new yoga instructor is wonderful. Tonight’s the first class.
Unfortunately, I don’t make the rules. We’ve had some major drama at the gym over the last week, and the end result is that I have lost my yoga instructor. And my Wednesday night yoga class. Sucks. Stupid drama.
I’m supposed to be studying. One more chapter of statistics, one more quiz, one more test. But it’s 8:30, I had a long day and a longer commute, and I just read the same paragraph (about goodness of fit) three times without anything other than that one phrase (and something about a distribution that conforms to some claim) to show for it.
So here – watch a commercial about kids and moms and the Olympics. I won’t tell anyone if you cry a little. I did most certainly did not.
You’ll feel better when you watch the Carlton Dance flash mob, led by Carlton himself.
I can’t concentrate today. I was productive for a while. Kind of. I picked up upstairs, bought new running shoes, deposited checks, bought groceries. Cooked dinner. Of course, my brain would rather dwell on the list of things I didn’t do today. I didn’t get my nails done (hardly a necessity, but at some point it went on my To Do list), I didn’t do any SQL or statistics homework, I didn’t go to the gym, I didn’t walk the dogs, I didn’t read my book (although I did finish listening to the audiobook John and I were listening to on the drive home yesterday), and I didn’t (I am SO done with italics for now) – oh, I lost my train of thought. There was another thing I didn’t do (I’m sure there are lots of other things I didn’t do), but I don’t remember what it was. I should really go back and re-order that sentence, but I’m not going to.
The biggest thing I didn’t do that I feel like I should have done is homework. It’s the middle of April already, and I’ve got lots to do. It’s just not getting done tonight, and I’m going to do my best not to worry about it. Because I’m tired. And I’m getting up early tomorrow to get downtown early tomorrow so I can stop working early tomorrow so I can meet friends I’ve never met. Everybody with me?
We’re home, safe and sound, and so are the dogs. Nothing happened to Roxy this weekend. (Thank you, Jess.) We had a highly successful Passover seder Friday night, I drank all the wine in the house Saturday night (Mom assures me I most certainly did NOT drink all the wine, but I felt like I had by Sunday morning), and we spent much of Sunday stealing books from Mom and Dad’s basement, all of which now live in OUR basement. The drive home was much better than anticipated (mostly because we listened to a fantastic book the whole way, but I’ll have more on that once we actually finish it – we have about an hour left), and when we arrived, we unloaded the books in about 30 minutes and picked up the dogs just before the kennel closed. Busy, but quick and over and done with. Details tomorrow. Maybe. I’ll think about it.
Is there any way I can talk about how I don’t have anything to say and make it interesting? I don’t think so. So…
Anxiety reared its ugly head again, but I beat it back with presents and winter penguin wrapping paper.
I don’t have a fear of crowds. I don’t have a fear of speaking or performing in front of people. Right now, though, I can’t seem to make myself go back to my gym classes. I haven’t been in about four weeks (I’ve been to the gym plenty, thank you very much, but only to work out on my own), and even though I really like those classes and I really like the people who take them and teach them, I don’t want to see them. I’m hiding. My plan for this afternoon was to stop working around four, go get my nails done, and get back to the gym in time for Muscle Blast and then yoga. Four came along, and I found myself procrastinating. Why would I do that? Why would I waste time when I could be at the nail salon? The later it got, the less likely it became that I’d have time to get my nails done in time to make it to class. And then I started trying to decide which I would rather do if I only have time for one. And then I realized that it’s the Wednesday before Christmas and I haven’t wrapped any presents yet. If I don’t do some (or all) of it tonight, I’ll only have tomorrow evening to get it done, and really, where are my priorities? The gym will still be there tomorrow morning (for weights) and tomorrow lunchtime (for cardio) (same for Friday), and if I have time, I can still get my nails done. And if I don’t have time, who cares? They can wait. Or I can – brace yourselves – do them myself.
So the anxiety I was feeling about going to the gym morphed into anxiety about my to do list, and I’ve sent it all away by deciding to wrap presents and watch TV and drink wine until John gets home (from another office Christmas party). I win!