Month: March 2017
Don’t bring me down
Let’s play a game:
Optimistic or Naive?
1. I ordered a t-shirt. The tracking information indicates it’ll arrive by 8pm today. Do I think it will? Of course I do!
A. Optimistic?
B. Naive?
2. I ordered mouse pads from Amazon. They’re being shipped by a company from China. They never arrived. I contacted the seller, and they responded immediately and said they would ship again. Do I think I’ll get those mouse pads? Of course I do!
A. Optimistic?
B. Naive?
3. I travel plenty. For the most part, my plans take off and arrive on time, I don’t miss connections, and my luggage arrives with me. Do I think that will continue to happen for me? Sure I do!
A. Optimistic?
B. Naive?
4. Earlier this week, the forecast showed pretty constant rain through the end of Friday. Today’s forecast shows rain today, but sunshine and a high of 60 degrees for tomorrow (Friday).
Do I think the weather will be nice tomorrow? Yes. Yes, I do!
A. Optimistic?
B. Naive?
Mystery solved
I figured it out! No, I don’t have a baby chest-burster lost in my skull (thanks, Michelle, for the image – that’ll linger). I rode today, and when I ride, I wear a helmet. When I wear a helmet, I put my hair in a ponytail, and the helmet goes on over the base of the ponytail. Some days I don’t get the placement just right, and midway through my lesson I become aware of this painful pressure in one spot near the base of my skull. I forget about it as soon as I take the helmet off, relieving the pressure, but apparently that 45 minutes or so of pressure leaves a lasting sensitive spot. That must have happened last Friday. I don’t remember that specifically, but I definitely remember that pain from other lessons, so I’m willing to go with this theory. My odds of survival are better with this theory.
I got the placement of my ponytail right today – no pain, no fear of aliens. Well, no pain.
When WebMD just doesn’t cut it
The back of my head, at the base, has been sensitive to the touch in one spot for a few days. I haven’t fallen or smacked my head on the wall or a low ceiling or a car recently (I have to say “recently” – those are all things I have done in the last year). Not that I remember, anyway.
I guess this is the beginning of the end. The aliens that burrowed into my brain and have been hiding for years are close to breaking out. Although why they’d choose to come out the back of my head instead of through my ears or nose like any self-respecting gross killer parasite, I don’t know. I’m expecting an explosion of bone and brain so, you know, keep your distance if you want to remain unspattered. I wouldn’t want to be responsible for ruining your favorite outfit.
Maybe I should get a raincoat
This is our weather forecast through the end of the week.
I think it might rain. At least it’ll be warm-ish.
This is my way of helping others make a difference
I did a thing I haven’t told you about yet, but I can tell you about it now because it’s live. It’s live and it’s out there and, like, real people can see it, and you know? It’s pretty cool.
So.
At the first rally I went to at the courthouse, maybe five or six weeks ago, I met a woman who was taking email addresses for the local chapter of NOW. They had just started up, didn’t even have their officers selected, and they were looking for members. I went to the monthly meeting four weeks ago, and before I knew it, I had volunteered to be their tech person.
So.
In the last month, I have worked with the president of the chapter (the woman who was taking email addresses – more on her some other time) to create and manage the official website of the South Willamette Valley chapter of the National Organization for Women.
I really should just upload the official logo. Instead, this is a picture I took of a banner with the official logo. Please don’t let this affect your opinion of my technical skills.
I am the web master, I am a member of the PR team, and I am a member of the Budget and Finance committee (because, like Mom, I sometimes have a hard time saying no to things).
So.
The website is live as of today (www.swvnow.org), the March monthly meeting is tomorrow night (Monday), and the plan is to tell everyone about it then even though it still has a couple of placeholders. Don’t tell me if you hate it, do tell me if something is wrong with it, and no, I’m not fishing for compliments. In fact, let’s just stop talking about it.
Two surprises
Something happened to me that has never happened to me before in Eugene, and has only rarely happened to me in other places we’ve lived.
I saw someone I know out in the wild.
And on top of that, she came over to me first! My facial person was just leaving the dog park, and she saw me stretching, so she came over to say hi. And I met her dog. I’ve said this before, but I almost NEVER run into people I know when I’m just out, and in a year, I’ve never seen anyone I know in Eugene. I suppose that could be because I hardly know anyone in Eugene, so the odds are against it. But it was nice! And only mildly awkward!
So that was surprise #1. Surprise #2 was this gadget I saw on my way home, one whose inventor was BRILLIANT and should win prizes.
Look, Ma, no training wheels! The dad was riding slowly ahead on his bike, the little kid was teetering along on his, and the mom was walking behind the kid, ready to grab the handle (which she did a couple of times).
I never liked training wheels. Too unsteady. And this is way handier than grabbing the back of the seat, right? So yeah, I am overcome by the brilliance of this simple idea.
The mighty motormouth
I couldn’t make myself stop talking today. (Yeah, yeah, you’re a bunch of comedians.)
I talked the ears off people in my work meetings, I asked a ton of questions during my riding lesson, and I kept up a constant stream of chatter directed at Tigger when Wendy wasn’t handy. I’m usually self-conscious about talking to the horse, which is why the nonstop babbling caught my attention. I talked to him while catching him, walking him to the stable, grooming him, walking him to the arena, while cooling him off and walking him back to the stable and feeding him treats. He didn’t toss me today, so I hope that means he appreciated the attention.
It’s more likely I wore him down so much he didn’t have the energy to shake me loose.
Piece of cake
I was a literal child, and I am a literal adult.* When my Dove Promise wrapper tells me to build a bridge with chocolate, I immediately wonder what would happen on a hot day when the chocolate starts to melt. That’s the image that comes to mind even as my brain interprets the message correctly. And then my brain smacks me on the nose and says, “IT’S A METAPHORICAL BRIDGE.” It’s a sickness, and it happens to me several times a week.
- Read something.
- See literal image of the thing.
- Correctly interpret the metaphor.
- Smack for being idiotic.
It’s quick and all internal (usually), which saves me a lot of embarrassment, but it makes the widespread misuse of the word “literally” a real problem for me. I don’t have to argue the case against using “literally” when you mean “figuratively” here. I know you all agree with me. I don’t know if you always imagine whatever the figurative thing is as a literal thing when someone says something like, “My brain literally exploded.”
You probably do, right? I’m not alone in this? I’m sure I’m not alone in this. I’ll admit to other oddball tendencies, but this is a universal thing among the grammatically correct. Yes? Yes.
*In keeping with the theme, I can’t help but point out that yes, I literally was a child, and now I’m literally an adult. I’m itching to change that sentence.
Zzzzzzzzzzz
I get up early every day, and I’m tired first thing in the morning, but I usually get over it pretty quickly. Today was not like that. John drove Molly back to Portland last night, spent the night there, and drove back this morning after dropping her off at the airport. I didn’t go because I had stupidly scheduled a ton of meetings (two with customers) for this morning, and I couldn’t reschedule them at the last minute (and one was at 5:30am). Instead, I stayed home, stayed up later than I should have, woke up at 2am, woke up at 4am, woke up at 4:36am, and then stayed awake until my alarm went off at 5. Then I snoozed for 10 minutes because of course I did. I have been fighting yawns and heavy eyelids all day. I rescheduled my riding lesson because I don’t think I could stay on in this condition, and I think I’m going to skip yoga because no one wants to hear me snore when they’re supposed to be finding their breath in the first five minutes of class.
The only thing that’s keeping me going right now is that it’s nice out for the first time in days and I want to run. It might be more like crawling, but at least I’ll get some sunshine. Then I can go to bed.