I slept in this morning. That’s why I had terrible dreams about cartoon villains murdering my pets.
I haven’t walked down to the river since mid-December. That’s why it’s frozen now.
I spent a little time today sorta kinda doing stretches that resemble yoga. That’s why the mailman didn’t pick up the package we left out for him.
I’m getting a haircut tomorrow. That’s why it’s going to rain.
I don’t like the cinnamon bun creamer I bought earlier this week. That’s why my eyelashes are stabbing me in the eye.
Makes as much sense as anything in the news.